Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
Mark Twain 
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/m/mark_twain_2.html#8pSydwCCCgJTf5l8.99 

Steps to Becoming Who You Want to Be

Who are you?

Actually, an even better question is....Who am I? Or, What am I? Or even, Why am I?

I have a pretty good feeling that I'm not the only one asking these questions of myself.  And, in fact, I imagine    that I'm not the only one lacking good answers to these questions.  

In light of these questions... I would like to post a few steps that I found from: http://www.wikihow.com/Build-Character-Through-Integrity

To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man(William Shakespeare, 1564-1616).

As this site states....there are two things that cannot (physically, etc.) be taken from you.  Integrity and Character.  In short, Character being "Who you are, your actions, your drive, etc.", and Integrity as "Doing the right thing...not because you were told to do so..... but because you (alone,internally, no one watching you, etc.) feel is the right thing to do" (the actions you take as a direct result of your inner drive).

I would also like to add "Knowledge" as something that cannot be taken away from you.  As the cliche saying goes...."Knowledge is Power", no matter the way it was obtained (school, work, etc.), it is yours and yours to do with as you see fit.  It's yours to obtain (and hopefully you have the drive to do so), and yours to share with others.  And most of all, it is yours to obtain within the approx. 70 to 90 years of life you have on Earth, and I hope you have the passion to never stop growing in your Knowledge.

Therefore, Character, Integrity, and Knowledge are three (of possibly more) things that each and everyone of us Homo Sapiens Sapiens have that cannot be taken from us.  No matter what your situation may be. 

But to return to the "steps" I referred to previously, the website lists these steps and also some "Tips" and "Warnings" to help you.  I would like to elaborate on these as follows: (This is strictly my interpretation, I am not a Professional (paid) individual, so therefore interpret this information as you see fit.)

1. First, understand the difference between Character and Integrity.  Your Character is the direct result of the Integrity you have. Saying this a different way....What you do defines you.  You have the Integrity to "stand the course" and do what you believe is the right.  And in doing so...you develop special characteristics (your Character) that define you.  "What you do defines you". Therefore, there will be no more "Who am I?" type questions.  You know who you are....you know what you stand for...and therefore you are who choose to be.
2. Second, "Choose to be".  What I mean by this is....now that you have established the "whatever I choose to stand  by and believe in...I will follow...and I will not falter"...you have to "Choose" that which you are to follow.  The website refers to religion as an option (ethics, morals, etc.).  Whatever it is you decide to choose...be sure its how you truly feel and long to be.  If your currently not the person you want to be, then simply ask yourself "Who do I want to be?", such as "When I lay down to sleep at night....am I proud of what I've done and who I am?", and also "What is it that I can stand my ground for, believe in, being above all peer pressure, internal conflicts, etc., and be proud of myself?".  Template greatness of the past as need be (we have the luxury to stand on the shoulders of great men/women of the past). And for all your choices, have a basis.  Have a base reason for why you chose to be this way.  What is it, in times of pressure and challenges to your beliefs, that you can fall back on and use as an "Answer" to your conflict? For example, to be tempted with cheating on your significant other, you fall back on the Ten Commandments of the Bible as a basis.  Or, you may have a basis from past experiences other people have been through in more recent times, "cheating leads to a breakdown in family values that eventually leads to hate, lust, divorce, (and many other issues that end up destroying other peoples lives) and therefore, I will not cheat on my wife/husband/girfriend/boyfriend."  A more day to day situation might be " I choose not to drink beverages with high sugar content, because (your basis) studies have shown that too much sugar is unhealthy".  The basis is your "Choice" that you choose to internalize and follow to become a better person (the person you want to be, and soon to be, the person you have become).
3. Thirdly, now that you have your "Choices" that you will internalize and follow (by means of Integrity), look at your past.  Look at who you were and reflect on the differences between your new "Choices" and your old self. Doing this will help solidify your "basis" for your new choices. Look back and ask, "What caused me to long for a change in my life?" and "How are my new life choices going to help me be a better person? a different person? a happier person?." As the website says, don't dabble in the past and begin to start feeling sorry for yourself.  YOU WANT CHANGE....THEN CHANGE! AND NEVER GIVE UP.  There will be times of trial and you might even fail.  Don't fret....This process is dynamic as life itself....don't give up...simply learn from the mistakes....alter your plan...and continue forward.  
4. Now that you've looked at the past.....And now that you've identified the differences between your past beliefs and what you want to now believe in.....specifically state what needs to be done to fix the difference. 
5. Lastly, be aware of your daily decisions.  No matter how small you think your daily choices are.....they define who you are. Remember...What you do defines you. Be conscious of your daily decisions.  Many people falter over time because they simply allow themselves to fall into their past habits and into their past beliefs.  IF YOU WANT TO BE A BETTER PERSON, IT STARTS WITH DAILY-EVERYDAY-CHOICES. It starts with you CONSTANTLY being aware of your decisions.  Practice stopping several times during the day and evaluating yourself.  Take a moment (if not even for a few seconds) to stop whatever your doing (or thinking about) and ask a simple question. Such as, "How am I doing today?".  This isn't to de-motivate you if the answer is "I'm not doing so well...I'm not acting how I should today...".  The whole point is to catch those types of moments, to catch yourself, so you can refocus yourself on the path you want to be on.  A good analogy would be walking on a path from point A to point B.  The path is straight, and it takes you to the Goal you want to reach.  Sometimes we fall off this path, walk the wrong way on the path, and even walk in circles on the path.  But, when we finally stop moving, take a breath and realize were not moving forward on our path.....we get back on and begin walking again....we refocus on the direction we want to take....and move forward.  If you think it will take 100 times a day to refocus on your path...then do it.  And if you realize you need to change the path to reach your goal...to stay aligned with your beliefs....then do so. This life is dynamic....always changing around us...we always going to be challenged in our beliefs and who we want to be in our time on this Earth.  

I leave this with a quote from "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button":

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”